What is consent? Consent means actively agreeing to be sexual with someone. Consent lets someone know that sex is wanted. Sexual activity without consent is rape or sexual assault.
Without consent, sexual activity (including oral sex, genital touching, and vaginal or anal penetration) is sexual assault or rape.
You get the final say over what happens with your body, even if you said yes earlier and then changed your mind. You’re allowed to say “stop” at any time, and your partner needs to respect that.
Consent is never implied by things like your past behavior, what you wear, or where you go. Sexual consent is always clearly communicated, there should be no question about whether or not the other person is okay with what's happening or not. Silence is not consent. And it’s not just important the first time you’re with someone. Couples who’ve had sex before or even ones who’ve been together for a long time also need to consent before sex.
People who are drunk, high, or passed out can’t consent to sex, there are many laws about this. There are also laws to protect minors (people under the age of 18) from being pressured into sex with someone much older than them or over the legal age.
The basics of consent, consent is:
Freely given: Consenting is a choice you make without pressure, manipulation, or under the influence of drugs or alcohol.
Enthusiastic: When it comes to sex, you should only do stuff you WANT to do, not things that you feel you’re expected to do.
Specific: Saying yes to one thing, doesn’t mean you’ve said yes to others.
Informed: You can only consent to something if you have the full story. For example, if someone says they’ll use a condom and then they don’t, there isn’t full consent.
Reversible: Anyone can change their mind about what they feel like doing, even if you’ve done it before.
What is sexual assault?
Sexual assault is a sexual act in which a person is coerced or physically forced to engage against their will. Sexual assault takes many forms including attacks such as rape or attempted rape, as well as any unwanted sexual contact or threats. Usually a sexual assault occurs when someone touches any part of another person's body in a sexual way, even through clothes, without that person's consent. The 4 main tips to know about consent:
Consent must be certain - There’s only one way to know for sure if someone has given their consent, if they tell you. It’s no good just to assume that the other person isok with everything that's happening. It’s extremely important to check, because any non-consensual sexual activity is harmful and against the law.
Changing your mind is ok and normal - If this happens, both people should stop.
Drink and drugs affect consent - If you’re drunk or high, you cannot give consent, if you’re sexual in any way with someone who's drunk or high and doesn’t know what’s going on, they cannot give consent, this is equivalent to raping them.
Make sure you check up on your partner - Take notice of your partner’s body language. For example, if they seem tense or uncomfortable, pause and ask them if they are ok and haven't changed their mind. But don’t rely on them to notice your uncomfortable behaviour, speak up and tell them how you’re feeling and if you want to stop, make sure they know.
Sexual Assault Recovery Services
Sexual Assault Counseling and Information Service (SACIS) SafeHouse Centre Rape, Abuse, Incest National Network (RAINN) Sexual Assault Helpline The Counseling Clinic
RSE
For my second rotation of modules, I participated in Relationships and Sexual Education. During this module you had to complete a project either on a sexually transmitted disease or sexual abuse and consent. I chose to do my project on sexual consent, I had to include how to give consent and how to prevent a mix up or miscommunication between the two partners. I really enjoyed researching this topic and I learnt a lot from it. I’d recommend spending some time on this project.